When Naomi Tucker first sought funding 15 years ago to help Jewish women escape an abusive relationship or marriage, the response was always the same.
Domestic violence? Not a problem in the Jewish community.
Tucker felt otherwise. So she assembled an all-volunteer staff to counsel victimized women. She set up a voicemail. Shalom Bayit (meaning “peace in the home”) became an agency — but without an address.
The story couldn’t be more different today.
Shalom Bayit celebrated 15 years of service in the Bay Area this month, in conjunction with Domestic Violence Awareness Month.
But the agency’s longevity isn’t the only excuse for commemoration.
The S.F.-based Jewish Community Federation named Shalom Bayit as a beneficiary. (The federation does not add a beneficiary every year.) Shalom Bayit can now rely on a stable funding source (its only one). This means the agency, once on the fringe of the organized Jewish community, has been accepted into it, Tucker said.
“We recognize that domestic violence is a real and important issue in our community, and part of our work in caring for the vulnerable means addressing the needs of battered women and their children,” said Tara Mohr, a senior planner with JCF.
Shalom Bayit is expanding, too. It recently published its original curriculum for Jewish teens, “Love Shouldn’t Hurt,” which Jewish educators across the country can use as a resource.
The organization also just established a second office in San Mateo (their first is in Oakland) and a support group in Marin.
That’s significant, Tucker said, because it’s frequently not safe for battered women to travel far or be away from home without an explanation.
“Having a physical presence in a community helps us be right where women need us,” she said.
For instance, even though Shalom Bayit’s programs serve the entire Bay Area, a disproportionate number (about 40 percent) of its clients come from the East Bay because its offices are in Oakland, Tucker said.
Shalom Bayit is a distinctly Jewish organization, staffers say. It blends counseling and education with Jewish healing, spirituality and rituals.
This is significant, Mohr said, and explains why the Jewish community should support the agency’s work.
“Many of the domestic violence organizations in the Bay Area are serving specific populations, because there are a lot of cultural issues that intersect with domestic violence,” Mohr said. “So of course we want women to be served by someone who understands that when Jewish women leave a relationship, they stay connected to their community, which creates a different safety-planning situation.”
For safety, Shalom Bayit does not publicize the address of its office space. For information about its new San Mateo location, call (650) 574-SAFE (7233). For information about its Oakland location or the new Marin support group, call (510) 451-SAFE (7233), or visit www.shalom-bayit.org.