Killed in a car accident last week, former Bay Area resident Rabbi Martin Ballonoff is remembered warmly here as a gentle man with a listening ear and a concern for the disadvantaged.
The former director of Berkeley Hillel, who went on to lead Petaluma’s Congregation B’nai Israel, died Tuesday of last week. According to the California Highway Patrol, his car drifted into the center median, then slid out of control, on Highway 101 near Mussel Shoals, an unincorporated area of Ventura County. He was 51.
“I don’t think words can describe how wonderful he was,” said Phyllis Feibusch, B’nai Israel’s administrator. “He was the softest, the gentlest. You could talk to him about anything. He was just a wonderful, wonderful person.”
Ballonoff joined B’nai Israel in 1990; it was his first synagogue pulpit. He left the Conservative congregation in 1994 and moved to Santa Barbara, where he managed his parents’ real estate holdings and served as a part-time rabbi at a synagogue in San Luis Obispo.
But he stayed in touch with the Petaluma congregation, offering advice and support through a rocky period during which his successor was sentenced to three years in prison for sexually molesting a 12-year-old student.
From Ballonoff, “I knew I could get a straight answer and an honest answer and a compassionate answer,” Feibusch said. “He never said to me, `I have to go. I can’t talk to you now.’ He was always ready to listen and ready to help no matter what anyone needed.”
Henry Libicki, B’nai Israel’s treasurer, hired Ballonoff. “He was such a decent individual,” Libicki said. “There are not enough positives you can say about this person.”
Prior to joining B’nai Israel, Ballonoff served as director of Berkeley Hillel for 11 years. The Cleveland native had a history with Hillel, having served for two years as associate director of the Hillel Foundation in Ann Arbor, Mich.
In Berkeley, he made an impression as a caring man who tried to include students of all backgrounds in Jewish life.
In a 1990 interview with the Bulletin, a former U.C. Berkeley student with cerebral palsy credited Ballonoff’s friendship and support with helping her feel part of the Jewish community for the first time.
“I owe him my Jewish identity,” Julie Weisman said. “He took me in, integrated me, made me feel a part of Hillel. He made sure I participated in everything.”
Such attentiveness was typical of Ballonoff, say those who knew him.
“He spent so much time and energy sometimes in helping one individual,” said Fred Rosenbaum, director of Lehrhaus Judaica, which shares a building with Hillel. Ballonoff taught classes at the adult education school.
“In addition to being masterful in Talmud, he knew a lot about mathematics, architecture,” Rosenbaum said.
Rosenbaum describes his friend as understated, “very quiet, very bookish, very self-disciplined.” But Ballonoff also knew how to let loose, often doing so by strumming the guitar or dancing.
Dance, particularly Jewish folk dance, “was his great relief and passion,” Rosenbaum said. Through it, “he was really able to develop another side of himself.”
Funeral services for Ballonoff were held Friday of last week at Congregation B’nai B’rith in Santa Barbara, where he was a member. A local memorial service will be held at 11 a.m. Sunday, Sept. 27 at Berkeley Hillel Foundation’s Reutlinger Center, 2736 Bancroft Way. For information, call (510) 845-7793.
Ballonoff is survived by his wife, Nelly, daughters Alisson and Camille, son Lani and mother Edith. He is also survived by his sister Lynn Beliak.
The family asks that donations be sent to the Minyan Fund at Congregation B’nai B’rith, 900 San Antonio Creek Road, Santa Barbara, CA 93111.