Anne Brown was 16 years old when she got a job taking care of two Great Danes owned by silent film actor Francis X. Bushman.
She wasn’t especially impressed by her employer, an immensely popular performer, who had starred in “Romeo and Juliet” in 1916 and “Ben Hur” in 1925.
Growing up in rural Wisconsin, she had worked since the age of 7, first on a farm in Racine and later in a hospital laundry. As the oldest daughter of nine children, she also was expected to help raise her brothers and sisters. That, she said, is why she left home for Chicago after her 16th birthday.
Bushman lived in the Rogers Park neighborhood of Chicago in the late 1920s. He paid Brown $9 a week. Because he took his dogs with him when he traveled, she was part of his entourage when he went to other cities.
But after three years, her job came to an abrupt end one night in Atlantic City. The 47-year-old movie star suddenly “tried to get sexy with me.”
Stunned, she pushed him away. He abandoned her there the next day.
Experience can be a hard taskmaster, but the lessons learned can last a lifetime. With the advantage of hindsight, they see things more clearly than they once did and have come to realize what, for them, is really important in life.
Now, some 65 years later, Brown sits crocheting an afghan for one of her great-grandchildren and offers some sage advice.
“Just watch yourself,” the 85-year-old warns. “I have worked so hard all my life. I always appreciated things. But I just don’t like being taken advantage of. It makes you more leery of being used. It taught me an awful lot, living and being on my own at 16.”
A serious automobile accident last year caused Norma VandeMerkt to rethink her lifestyle. At a time when most people are retiring, the grandmother of three was shouldering an often exhausting full-time job as food supervisor at a local golf course.
She was on her way home from work one day when a car crossed the center line and crashed head-on into hers. Her ankle was broken in 12 places. It was in a cast for three months. To complicate her recovery, she began to experience panic attacks.
With newfound time to reflect, she realized she had sacrificed many of life’s pleasures at the altar of hard work. She decided that time was valuable, and she was going to start spending more of it on herself.
“I decided there was more to life than just working all the time,” said VandeMerkt, who is 65 and now works part time. “I started getting back to some of the old things I used to do. I have a different perspective on life. I’m doing more things that I want to do.”
Those things include reading more books, going to more plays, playing bridge and spending more time with her husband on their boat on Lake Michigan.
“I’m really happy,” she said.
So is Betty Joray, a 71-year-old widow and cancer survivor. She has kept busy since retiring from her job as a hospital secretary seven years ago. She said that the years have taught her the importance of an active social life and that worry is a waste of time.
“You can sit home and feel lonesome or you can get out and be with people,” said Joray, a serene woman who says she is no longer governed by the clock. “Lighten up and don’t take everything so seriously. I learned that over the years. You can do a lot of worrying, but it’s not going to do any good anyway.”
Joray attends dance classes at a community center each week. It was there that she met 78-year-old Ed Linchester. They have been dancing, riding bikes and enjoying life together ever since.
Linchester, a widower, shares Joray’s upbeat outlook and sense of humor. A positive, fun-loving attitude, he said, is the key to happiness.
“Don’t get down in the dumps,” he advises. “You might as well have a little fun because this is what [life] is. This is what we’ve got. Make the best of it.”
For Gilbert Lisano, the Boy Scouts and religious faith taught him some of life’s most enduring lessons.
“The Boy Scout oath tells you all there is to know,” he said. “The Ten Commandments tells you how you should be leading your life. You should be respectful to your family, your friends and, mostly, to yourself. That’s the big thing.”
He hasn’t stopped learning. In recent years, the 65-year-old has had two strokes, forcing him to take an early retirement from his job as vice president for a computer firm. This experience, he said, taught him the importance of a positive mental attitude, how to persevere in the face of great difficulties and why to appreciate each new day.
After years of hard work, Brown has earned these days of unhurried leisure. Her movie star boss is a mere footnote in a life that has included such challenges as an unhappy first marriage, a divorce and, in recent years, cancer.
But she has also enjoyed the blessings of five children, 14 grandchildren, 11 great-grandchildren, a successful second marriage and the ability to stay strong during times of adversity.
“It’s a great life,” she said, “if you don’t weaken.”