The olfactory sense provides us with some of our strongest memories; quite literally, we all have a nose for nostalgia. The aroma of fresh horseradish might suddenly bring you back to a Shaker Heights Passover seder at Uncle Steve’s in 1959. A spritz of perfume at the Macy’s counter might hearken back to an old flame, or, more likely, Aunt Rita.
And, finally, the oddly pleasant odor of slowly decomposing LPs wafting into your face as you peruse the used section brings two names to mind: Mickey Katz and Allan Sherman.
Their relegation to the dollar bin of history is no knock on Sherman and Katz, two performers who actually lost a significant portion of their fan bases when the Angel of Death slew the first-born throughout all of Egypt.
It is something of a knock, however on the compilers of the collection of Jewish schlock rock “Now That Sounds Kosher!” that they led off their album with the pair of fossils. What’s worse — it was probably the right decision.
In addition to Katz and Sherman, the CD of novelty tunes does pack in some name (and living) performers: Tom Lehrer, “Weird Al” Yankovic, Kinky Friedman and the immortal Mel Brooks. Unfortunately, in order to get to these Jewish princes, you must kiss a lot of Jewish frogs.
Take, for example, 2 Live Jews’ 1990 novelty hit “As Kosher as They Wanna Be.” Today, the shelf life of a novelty hit is shorter than that of sushi, so the phrase “1990 novelty hit” says a lot. Secondly, who in the year 2005 wants to hear a spoof of a played-out rap number from 2 Live Crew, a diabolically awful group that played on its now-quaint lewdness? For this album’s $14 cover price, you could probably summon a command performance from 2 Live Crew itself.
Without naming names, a few of these kosher parodies should be sent, express mail, to Guantanamo Bay. In half an hour, you’d have the name of every al-Qaida operative in the known universe.
Yet, to steal the Monty Python “compliment,” Mel Brooks’ “The Inquisition” bit from “History of the World, Part I” brings to mind a stream of bat urine — that is to say, it “shines out like a shaft of gold when all about is dark.”
No, you can’t see the grand inquisitor leading a tap-dancing chorus line. You can’t see a giant slot machine with Chassidim in place of the traditional cherries, limes and pineapples. And you certainly can’t see a convent of nuns disrobing for an impromptu Esther Williams number capped by a human menorah turned by a troupe of aquatic rabbis.
You can, however, hear the divinely dark and silly lyrics: “Confess, don’t be boring/Say yes, don’t be dull/A fact, you’re ignoring/It’s better to lose your skullcap than your skull/Oy gevalt!”
And, a note to all young parents out there: Teach your 5-year-old kid the Jackie Mason bit — about Catholic tormentors utilizing parts of his anatomy to complete a Ping-Pong game — as a party trick to amuse friends. The ramifications will stretch into the decades to come.
Just trust us on this, OK?
“Now That Sounds Kosher,” Shout! Factory, $13.98. For more information, see www.shoutfactory.com.