A rabbi, whose grandfather had been a disciple of the Ba’al Shem, was asked to tell a story. “A story,” he said, “must be told in such a way that it constitutes help in itself.”
And he told: “My grandfather was lame. Once they asked him to tell a story about his teacher. And he related how the holy Ba’al Shem used to hop and dance while he prayed. My grandfather rose as he spoke, and he was so swept away by his story that he himself began to hop and dance to show how the master had done. From that hour he was cured of his lameness. That’s the way to tell a story!”
Rabbis and preachers have long known that a good anecdote can invigorate a sermon, in much the same way as the tale about the Ba’al Shem Tov pumped life into the grandfather’s limbs.
“That’s why the New Testament and the Hebrew Scriptures are filled with parables,” said Stephen Pearce, senior rabbi at San Francisco’s Congregation Emanu-El “It’s the stories that speak clearly to us.” But Pearce, who has a doctorate in counselor psychology, also believes that a decent yarn can catapult a therapy session to new heights.
The rabbi, already the author of two children’s books, lays out the theory in his first book for adults, “Flash of Insight: Metaphor and Narrative in Therapy.” A psychology text, the book is filled with stories therapists can use to help patients form their own insights.
“Good advice is not always helpful,” the 49-year-old Reform rabbi said recently. “It assumes people are rational.” A good number of the stories in the book come from the Jewish tradition, particularly from Chassidic story-tellers who believed Jews could reach God through stories, song and dance.
Still, why is a rabbi writing about the psyche instead of the psalms? Pearce believes that rabbis should know more about psychology and therapy than they’re taught in seminary. He sees himself as a prime example. On his first job as a rabbi at age 26, Pearce was visited by a man with an “intimate sexual problem.” Though he had majored in psychology as an undergraduate and had taken a couple of seminary courses on counseling, Pearce realized he just didn’t know how to help.
“I immediately enrolled in a master’s program,” he recalled. Propelled by a deep-seated belief that rabbis needed professional training in psychology, Pearce taught courses in counseling and therapy for 20 years in New York at Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion, while he worked as a congregational rabbi in Connecticut. Though his psychology book had long been in Pearce’s head, he finally began putting ideas onto paper about four years ago.
“Flash of Insight” was released earlier this year. In his informal and formal counseling sessions with congregants over the years, Pearce said he has successfully used stories time and time again. Sometimes congregants cannot overcome their grief from the death of a family member, for example. The biblical story about Lot’s wife can help them, he said. In the story, Lot and his family are escaping Sodom after God decides to destroy the city. They are not supposed to look back, but Lot’s wife turns her head for one last peek. She becomes frozen in place and turns into a pillar of salt.
Congregants who hear the story realize they cannot focus on the past forever, Pearce said. “Just that thought can be liberating.” If rabbis could do a better job helping congregants deal with “their issues,” he noted, more Jews might turn to their synagogue on a regular basis.
“Most people see the synagogue as the drop-off place,” Pearce said. “The way I see Judaism is as a belief system that helps people deal with life.” Yet Pearce also believes that rabbis shouldn’t address problems if they aren’t prepared. Many rabbis take extra courses in psychology, he said, but some believe they intuitively know how to help congregants.
“I wouldn’t risk one of my children on someone who’s intuitive,” he said.
“Flash of Insight: Metaphor and Narrative in Therapy” by Rabbi Stephen Pearce (196 pages, Allyn & Bacon, $41.95)