Super Sunday. It only comes once a year. So when your phone rings on Sunday, Nov. 24, don’t let your answering machine pick up the call. Instead, give — and give generously — to the S.F.-based Jewish Community Federation’s annual fund-raiser.
The need for tzedakah is no laughing matter. But in the great tradition of Jewish humor, we offer the top 10 reasons why you should open your heart and wallet this weekend:
10. Convenience. How much easier could it be to give tzedakah than to respond to a volunteer’s friendly voice? Hey, we’re not asking you to fend off the entire Roman army. Just to pick up the phone.
9. Compassion. It’s the perfect gift. It’s easy to wrap. It always fits. And you don’t need to walk it.
8. Tradition, tradition. Federations have been helping Jews for more than 100 years. Why should they stop now?
7. Urgency. That money is burning a hole in your pocket, and there are Jews in need.
6. Avoidance. Think of the bad purchases you might make with that disposable income. Mock chinchilla seat covers. Hand-held neck massagers. Appointments with Don King’s barber. It could get ugly.
5. Generosity. It’s the right thing to do. It’s a mitzvah. “If I am only for myself, what am I?” You always did like that Rabbi Hillel.
4. Anti-establishment. The federal government is slashing funds for the needy. It’s up to you to fight the system.
3. Guilt. What would Great-aunt Sadie say if she knew you weren’t giving? “After all we did for you…”
2. Guilt. We know you’ll eat 17 latkes next month. You don’t really need something else to feel guilty about.
1. Guilt. Why do you think it sounds so much like gelt?
Assuage that guilt and do the right thing. The federation aids Jews in the Bay Area, the former Soviet Union and Israel. These Jews need your help. So when the phone rings Sunday, be there.