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Public images of contemporary American Jewish masculinity run the gamut — from the aggressively macho Meir Kahane to the insecure nebbishes played by Woody Allen.

For Berkeley resident Michael Taller, neither violent militant nor shrinking violet are acceptable images for American Jewish men seeking role models.

Taller, founding director of the Jewish Men's Project, believes the proper model for masculinity can be found deep within the traditions of Jewish culture: It is to be a mensch.

"Being a mensch means being thoughtful, sensitive and caring," Taller said. At the same time, "we get a very strong message in American culture that men are supposed to be tough, domineering, physical, sexual beings," he added.

"Many Jewish men are faced with a conflict between the norms taught in our Jewish families and the norms taught in our general society."

With that in mind, Taller will lead a program titled, "A Mensch Among Men: A Jewish Men's Discussion of Men and Jewish Masculinity," Sunday, March 9 at Congregation Beth Sholom in San Francisco.

"Jewish men have a lot to teach about a humane way of being masculine," he said. "I'm also interested in Jewish men getting to have more flexibility in how we express our masculinity."

Taller, formerly the assistant director of Berkeley Hillel, began the Jewish Men's Project last summer. His actual inspiration came 4-1/2 years ago, after the delivered a talk at a conference on men and masculinity.

"Dozens of Jewish men came up and thanked me for talking about the issues in their lives," he recalled. "They could all relate to my being able to articulate the deeply personal difficulties that I felt, and that they felt, too."

Taller's ability to express his feelings came from years working as a peer counselor, alliance-building trainer and leader of workshops with such titles as "Unlearning Anti-Semitism," "Blacks and Jews" and "Relationships Between Jewish Women and Men."

Regarding the latter, Taller noted that he purposely chose International Women's Day for the date of the "Mensch" workshop — not as a challenge to women but as a gesture of respect.

"I'm a very strong feminist," he said. "I am completely supportive of events for Jewish women which develop Jewish women's community and give Jewish women the opportunity to expand their lives.

"Jewish men often feel ambivalence in the face of those programs, but I advocate that we support women's programming. I believe this program is completely compatible with programs for Jewish women."

Taller was careful to distance the "Mensch" workshop from what he called "the mythopoetic men's movement," with Robert Bly as its most visible leader, which evokes stereotypical images of men bonding in the woods while they beat drums and bash women.

"The program will address the emotional, physical, spiritual and intellectual needs of men," he said. "But there will be singing, not drumming."

The singing, which he said he always incorporates in his programs, will be the wordless melodies known in Hebrew as niggunim.

"Bly and the men's movement use ritual and mythology as an avenue for personal growth," he said. "I use Jewish culture, our stories, especially that of Jacob, as a way to look at images of Jewish men and talk about the nitty-gritty issues of our lives."

In the years after he gave that initial talk, Taller worked with hundreds of Jewish men, and he kept seeing the same issues arising with "no mechanism" to address them.

"Those issues involve our struggles with our sense of manhood and masculinity, the difficulties in being able to know what we want for our lives and work, our difficulty with emotional intimacy, and especially, overintellectalizing — being more in our heads than our souls, hearts and bodies," he said.

"I decided it was time to form the group to deal with Jewish men's issues."

In his workshops, Taller has observed certain common issues among Jewish men of certain age groups. He has found that teenagers and young men need to talk about the pressures that come from being college students and young adults enjoined to achieve, while men in their 30s to 50s struggle with meaning, closeness and dissatisfaction with their lives.

Taller said he has a few new things in the works this year for the Jewish Men's Project: a daylong conference on Jewish men's issues and a weekend retreat for Jewish men.

"I don't see the work with Jewish men as being a peripheral idea for the Jewish community," he said. "It's a central issue that needs to be paid attention to. It affects the half of the Jewish community that is men, and the other half that relates to them."