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What's an Orthodox Jewish woman to do?

In Susswein's case, complaining was not an option. Along with other members of her synagogue, Congregation Beth Israel in Berkeley, she founded a new singles group.

Beth Israel Singles will hold its kick-off event, a Chanukah party, on Wednesday, Dec. 24. It will feature Chanukah jingles, latkes, gelt and all manner of Festival of Lights cheer. Like all events sponsored by the group, it will be a strictly kosher affair.

Beth Israel considers itself a modern Orthodox congregation; the group, Susswein says, will reflect that perspective.

"We're not ultra-Orthodox. We're just modern Orthodox Jews who keep halachah and would like to have a really great singles group we can participate in.

"That has been totally absent in the Bay Area," says Susswein, who lives in Berkeley. "I'm originally from New York; there are lots of groups like this in New York."

As a traditional Jewish singles group, Beth Israel Singles will not hold events on Shabbat. If the group schedules a Shabbaton, or overnight Shabbat event, participants will be promised sleeping arrangements within walking distance.

Mixed-gender dancing is likely to take place at future events, but not those held at the synagogue. "We would have to find another venue," she says. "I don't know if it would be appropriate to have mixed dancing in the shul."

Still, despite such departures from less traditional Jewish singles groups, Susswein stresses that "we're not just for observant people. Anybody who is Jewish or studying to convert or related in any way to the Jewish people is welcome no matter what their level of observance.

"We're not in any way judgmental," she adds. "Everybody is free to do and practice as he or she wishes. What we're doing is having a venue where it's possible to keep halachah."

Beth Israel's Rabbi Eliezer Finkelman views that outlet as important.

"A halachically committed Jew would certainly prefer to have a halachically committed Jew as a mate," he says. "Setting up some sort of system which makes it more likely the person you meet will share that commitment is very helpful."

At the new Beth Israel group, "all singles are welcome, from age 19 to 99," Susswein says.

The group will be inclusive in other ways, as well. While a donation of $5 to $10 is requested for the Chanukah party, no one will be turned away for lack of funds. "Anyone who can't afford to pay can come in for free," Susswein says. "All we'll ask them to do is stay and help clean up — a working scholarship."

And wallflowers had better get ready to come to the center of the dance floor.

"We're always going to have some sort of planned activity so that people who tend to be shy won't just be sitting in the corner not having anyone to talk to," Susswein says. "We're going to really get people involved."

In the case of the Chanukah party, involvement will come in the form of a trivia-dreidel game. Upon arriving, partygoers will write down their names and toss them into a box — men's names in one, women's in another.

One name will be picked at random from each, then put together, making an instant trivia team. And, who knows? Maybe a shiduch, as well.