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Passover

A man asked Rabbi Yosef Dov of Brisk, "Is it possible to fulfill the mitzvah of the four Passover cups by drinking milk?"

"No," the rabbi replied, and gave the man an unusually large sum of tzedakah. After the man left, the rabbi's wife said, "He doesn't need all that money just to buy wine. Why did you give him so much?"

Rabbi Yosef replied, "The Shulchan Aruch, the compendium of Jewish law has an unwritten section — the law of kindness and understanding. I gave the man extra money to apply that law. If he asked about milk, it meant that he intended to have a dairy meal for Passover. If he intended to have a dairy meal for Passover, that meant that he did not have enough to buy a chicken for a meat meal because he would never have used milk as a substitute for wine if he intended to have a meat meal. Therefore, I gave him the additional sum for him to have a proper Passover meal."

Rabbi Yosef Dov's act of charity is noble because his perceptiveness enabled him to see with his heart as well as with his mind. Rabbi Yosef intuitively drew conclusions other people might have missed. If, like Rabbi Yosef, we were to know what is in people's hearts and on their minds, we would treat others with greater respect and offer more help than we might ordinarily. However, looking into the souls of others and responding to their needs requires more than a consideration of heart and mind; it requires an understanding of an individual's character as well.

A central feature of the Passover celebration is the Haggadah's portrayal of the four sons — the wise, the wicked, the simple and the one who does not know how to inquire. Through this pedagogic tool the Haggadah stresses the importance of considering a person's character in assessing his comments and behavior, and how to respond to his inquiries with proper demeanor.

What does the portrayal of the chacham, the wise child, illustrate? A child with an innate thirst for knowledge, the reader is told, will not be satisfied with a brief summary of a narrative like the Passover saga. Rather, such an inquiring mind requires detailed exegesis on the fine points of the Jewish law in order to keep him engaged in study and prayer.

What does the portrayal of the rasha, the wicked child, illustrate? The child is referred to in this way because he excludes himself from the community by asking: "What does this commemoration mean to you?"

While the author of the Haggadah recommends a stern rebuke, the demeanor of this disobedient and difficult child raises the question of whether one should respond by being equally stern or instead draw this child into the circle of the community through patient and loving lessons. Educators recognize that defiant children often do not learn in a hostile environment.

What does the portrayal of the tahm, the simple child, illustrate? Not every individual is interested in or capable of receiving anything more than a brief lesson. Nevertheless, addressing this child according to his ability by designing engaging, age-appropriate explanations enables the leader of the seder to reach this individual.

What does the portrayal of the sheh-ayno yodayah l'shol, the child who does not know how to ask, illustrate? One who does not understand the meaning of a celebration cannot frame a question. To such an individual, teaching must begin at the very beginning, taking him step by step through the entire account. In this way he will learn how to frame questions as he grows older.

There is more to Passover than the recounting of the long trek from slavery to freedom. The celebration of the multinamed Passover Festival — chag hamatzot, chag aviv, chag haPesach and z'man hayrutaynu (festivals of unleavened cakes, of spring, of the Paschal sacrifice, and of the time of our freedom) — is rich with meaning. However, it is more than just stacks of white matzot, bowls of salt water, mounds of bitter herbs and the remembrance of the springtime sacrifice. Rabbi Yosef Dov of Brisk's generosity, as well as the Haggadah's classification of children, remind celebrants that Passover is a time to listen to family and friends with mind as well as with heart. Only then will those who gather to read the ancient words hear their deepest message.