Q: What is the difference between a tailor and a psychiatrist?

A: A generation

A visit to the doctor

Rose went to see her doctor. “Doctor, I need your help,” she said. “I just can’t stop talking to myself.”

“Do you suffer any pain?” asked her doctor.


“In that case,” he said, “go home and don’t worry. Millions of people talk to themselves … It’s nothing to worry about.”

“But doctor,” cried Rose, “you don’t know what a boring person I am!”

The conversation

Two rabbis were discussing the decline in morals in the modern world.

“I didn’t sleep with my wife before I was married,” said one rabbi. “Did you?”

“I don’t know,” said the other. “What was her maiden name?”

So religious

When he arrived in New York, the customs official was perplexed as to why anybody would have five sets of gold teeth. So Moisha explained.

“Ve Orthodox Jews have two separate sets of dishes for meat products and dairy products but I am so kosher and religious I also have separate sets of teeth.”

The customs official shook his head and said, “Well that accounts for two sets of teeth. What about the other three?”

Moisha then said “Vell us very religious Orthodox Jews use separate dishes for Passover, but I am so religious I have separate teeth, one for meat and one for dairy food.

The customs official slapped his head and then said, “You must be a very religious man with separate teeth for food and dairy products and likewise for Passover. That accounts for four sets of teeth. What about the fifth set?”

“Vell to tell you the truth, once in a vile I like a ham sandwich.”

These jokes have been e-mailed to us by friends and associates who, for the most part, have downloaded them. We therefore cannot verify the authorship.