Kol HaMishpacha translates from Hebrew into “the whole family,” but at Congregation Rodef Sholom in San Rafael, it isn’t a phrase restricted to blood relatives.
A program by that name, formed for the synagogues’ young parents and their children, is expanding the boundaries of family by hosting seders and inviting Rodef Sholom’s seniors.
To date, the Kol HaMishpacha program has extended invitations to seniors for two main events: a Tu B’Shevat seder and a Passover learning seder. And even though each event was a while ago, congregants are still glowing from the experiences, and both are already on the 2009 calendar.
“Adding a third generation to our seders … that made the learning even deeper for parents and their kids,” said Claire Mikowski, assistant director of education at Rodef Shalom.
Mikowski noted that for many of the families, the seders were the first time young families were practicing traditional holiday rituals with their children. By listening to the seniors talk about their holiday traditions, many of the families were able to glean valuable tips for having special holiday meals at home.
Around tables of ritual foods — dates and nuts on Tu B’Shevat, and plenty of charoset on Passover — seniors were informally invited to share their stories of previous seders they had experienced.
For Joshua Archer, a Kol HaMishpacha parent of a 7-year-old and a 3-year-old, the opportunity to involve his family with older congregants was a treat.
“I’ve already formed friendships with some of the seniors through other groups, and I know them in an adult context,” he said. “But meeting them in a family context was a new thing, letting them share and see this side of me.”
He sensed that the seniors, too, greatly enjoyed the exchange.
“The seders,” he said, “made the seniors feel valued and part of the changes” taking place at Rodef Sholom.
Another benefit for the seniors: “My kids are loving creatures, and some of the seniors who don’t have family in the area especially enjoyed being with them,” Archer said.
The seders are just two examples of a larger movement at the synagogue. Older community members, many of whom have been Rodef Sholom members for more than 40 years, are being included in more of the synagogue’s family programs and traditions.
When asked whether seniors would feature into future Kol HaMishpacha events, program coordinator Amy Kassiola exclaimed, “Absolutely! We’ve been so thrilled and encouraged by the participation of seniors in these events that we wouldn’t imagine not inviting them to future activities.”
She said that one of the exciting aspects of the collaboration is that many seniors are learning the “latest, cutting-edge” customs and teachings in Judaism.
“And for the families, many separated from their own elders, the seniors can provide a connection to the past that they really appreciate and enjoy,” Kassiola added.