What do you do when some members of your congregation are Orthodox, some are Conservative and some are Reform? What happens when representatives of each faction all have their own ideas of how to run a service?
For that matter, what do you do when a considerable portion of your congregation is too physically weak to hold up a prayer book?
The main challenge is that every member counts, says Ring, who has been conducting services in the home’s front room for the past 17 years. He rises to this challenge by always trying to keep the congregants involved, always helping them participate in the service.
“Just because they’re old,” he says, “you don’t take them for granted.”
Ring’s official title at the home is religious coordinator. Around 20 congregants attend regular Sabbath services, and up to 50 arrive on holidays. Unsurprisingly, he also conducts memorial services and even burial services for the home’s residents.
Most residents are either unaffiliated with another temple or unable to attend a synagogue outside the nursing home’s grounds, said facility administrator Tracie Murray.
Ring tries various gambits to keep his congregation aware and involved. For awhile, he thought about reprinting prayer books in pamphlet form so the weaker members of the congregation could hold them up. That never panned out. But he has gotten positive results from keeping the services short.
He also conducts services with an eye toward how the majority of his congregation appears to be feeling that day.
“Sometimes they’re in a bad mood, so you have to go with that.”
In a nursing facility, where residents with different disabilities function at different levels, the term “bad mood” can have many meanings. A resident who has become confused can disrupt services, said former administrator Andrea Dapper.
But even the most disruptive resident can retain a Jewish identity, she said, and the service should be tailored accordingly.
“It’s kind of a juggling act — what’s appropriate and what isn’t,” Dapper said.
Another juggling act involves Ring’s title.
“Some people found it acceptable that he was not a rabbi; some didn’t,” Dapper recalled. Staff members tended to be “Orthodox to high-end Conservative. Then every once in awhile you’d get someone who wondered why we didn’t serve bacon.”
So it’s perhaps inevitable that Ring’s services take a middle path.
“If you want to get doctrinaire, it’s more or less Conservative,” Ring said. “It leads to conflicts sometimes. But I have a fair idea of what kind of service I want to have.”
Ring’s services present no problems for resident Rebecca Ferber, 82, even though all the synagogues she attended previously were Orthodox. She says she is used to adapting to circumstances.
Ring’s approach seems to suit most residents just fine, Murray said.
“For the most part they appreciate the services, because Barry brings to the home the Jewish element.”