The ceremony of pidyon haben — redemption of the firstborn son — can be the basis for a large celebration, a small one or none at all. But watch out! It’s only done in specific cases.
Literally, pidyon haben means “redemption of the son” or “buying back the son.”
Exodus 13:1-3 tells us that a son who is the firstborn of his mother belongs to God; or more specifically, to the Kohen (priest) who serves in the worship of God. Later in the Torah, we “redeem” the child, or buy him back. While there is no way to fix the “worth” of a baby boy, the buy-back price is stated in the Torah as five shekalim of silver — nowadays, five silver dollars.
This transaction generally takes place when the baby is 31 days old. (By tradition, if the baby has survived the first 30 days, his chances for good health are assured.) If that 31st day is a Shabbat or holiday, the ceremony is postponed to the evening or to the next day, but we try to do it as soon as possible.
The ceremony is not that common, for several reasons: The baby needs to be a firstborn son. Therefore, if there are any older siblings, you don’t do pidyon haben. Also, if either the mother or father is the offspring of a Kohen or a Levi, there is no ceremony. The purpose of the ceremony is to exempt the baby from serving with Kohanim/Leviim, but if the baby belongs to one of those families anyway, he need not be exempted.
In addition, Exodus 13:13 specifies that the baby needs to be peter rechem, the first “natural exiting from the womb.” So pidyon haben is not done for infants born by cesarean section, or — in general — when the mother has had a previous miscarriage or abortion.
Given all these exceptions, it’s easy to see why the ceremony is only performed for a small minority.
Most of the time the ceremony takes place in the home. Essential elements include the baby, a Kohen, the parents, five silver dollars, bread and wine, and a script (provided by the Kohen). In many cases, the Kohen will also bring the five silver dollars, which you can “buy” from him for a small amount. The money usually goes to charity.
Technically, the mitzvah is performed by the father, but both parents are usually present.
The ceremony itself is quite short — about five minutes. Part of a “meal of rejoicing,” it begins with washing the hands and saying HaMotzi over the bread. Then the father or parents state that they want to perform the mitzvah of redeeming their son. The baby is handed to the Kohen, who then asks the parents if they really want to buy back their son (they must say yes, even for a colicky baby). The parents give the Kohen the silver coins and take back the baby, then read aloud two blessings in Hebrew and/or English. The Kohen pronounces a blessing over the baby, everyone says Kiddush over a cup of wine, and the meal begins.
As for whether to hold a reception, this is totally discretionary. Just the parents and the baby can be present or as many friends and family members as you like.
The writer, a Kohen, is cantor of Congregation Agudath Israel in Caldwell, N.J., and has happily taken part in many ceremonies of pidyon haben.