The question in Burt Bacharach and Hal David’s “What’s It All About, Alfie?” is universal. According to Rabbi Levi Meier, people of all ages with all sorts of problems want to know the answer every single day.
Meier, chaplain of Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles, spoke last week at a session titled “Healing the Healer” at the 10th annual conference of the National Association of Jewish Chaplains held in Burlingame.
The 52-year-old rabbi, who is also a clinical psychologist, has written “Using Stories of the Bible to Improve Our Everyday Life” and “Moses — The Prince, the Prophet: His Life, Legend and Message for Our Lives.”
“As we continue to search for answers to the question `What’s it all about,” Meier said, “the only truth is that which is lived, pertaining to your relationship with God and other people. Most people who work in a medical environment fall into two categories: healers and patients.
“As rabbis, we can go back and forth between the two.”
Meier says nothing is more humbling than being a patient. Having recently been one himself, he believes the experience increased his understanding of pain, suffering and depression as well as the importance of patient dignity.
He also posed one of his other concerns: “Who takes care of the healer?”
Healers confront illness, suffering and death on an almost daily basis, with constant negativity. How can the healer get comfort?
He suggests that each chaplain needs five healing relationships: with a rabbi, a therapist, a soul friend, oneself and God.
So how should one react to crises?
Meier turns to a story about Moses as an example. The great prophet is mourning the death of his sister, Miriam, who had been very close to him.
Panicked at the time about the dwindling water supplies, the Israelites plead with Moses, saying: “Give us water, we are thirsty.” Moses answers angrily, “Can’t you let me mourn?”
The people don’t leave Moses alone. He is caught up in the conflict of multiple roles between mourning and leading his people.
He was “on-call” at all times.
“His mistake of placing his personal emotions ahead of his responsibilities as a leader of his people cost him dearly,” Meier said. “Because of it he was told he would not be allowed to enter the Promised Land.”
Shortly thereafter, Moses is told to appoint Joshua as his successor.
“This shows us that ultimately we are all replaceable,” Meier said, “even though we are each unique, special and needed for the important work we do.”
There is another lesson in the Moses story, he added.
“The goal of the journey is the journey itself.”
Although Moses knows he will never make it to the Promised Land, he allows the Israelites’ journey to continue, taking 40 years instead of several days.
“Take each moment of the journey and know it is a sacred moment,” Meier said. “Take the sacredness of the moment and care about the person for that moment. We have the ability to take pain that we experience and witness and transform it through our own creativity into something that can help to heal ourselves and others.”
Perhaps Bacharach and David’s song contains part of the answer to the universal question of what’s it all about: “I believe in love, Alfie. Without true love, we just exist, Alfie.”